'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a moose666,
The Gavacs were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that Karak Null soon would be there;
The Sempers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Saxy danced in their heads;
And Daddy'o in his 'kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a LK3 nightcap,
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the Cannon I flew in a heap,
I'll shoot this old bastard who's disturbing my sleep.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to Wesbot below,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear so soggy,
But a miniature Yoda, and eight little Doggy's,
With a little old driver, driving so cack,
I knew in a moment it must be [OFc] Schlack.
More rapid than Pingu's his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
"Now, ASMEGA! now, FR43NK! now, DANNYF and MUDSHARK!
On, JAZZYJAY! on PORING! on, STAN and QUAZERK!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now fuck away! fuck away! fuck away all!"
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of Psyco, and N3mes1s too.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,
Down the chimney Slarti came with a bound.
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;
A bundle of Crap he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly prat,
And I laughed when I saw him, and called him a twat;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Then told all the kids to fuck off to bed;
He gave it a Jackdb, he gave it a jerk,
This night-time wanking is sure hard work,
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
FUCK OFF YOU [OFc] CUNTS, AND TO ALL A GOOD-NIGHT!
Xmas
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