1. Interpretation.......
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"
2. What does a dwarf get if he runs through a womans legs ???......
A. A clit around the ear and a flap across the face
3. Why don't guys like to preform oral sex on a woman after sex?
A. Have you ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese sandwich?
4. Why was the washing machine laughing?
A. Because it was taking the piss out the underpants.
5. What do you do with a years worth of used condoms?
A. Melt them down, and turn them into a tire. Then call it a Goodyear.
6. What's the difference between a penis and a bonus?
A. Your wife will always blow your bonus!
7. A man goes to a fancy dress party wearing nothing but a jamjar on his cock.
A lady asks "What are you dressed as?"
He says a fireman!
You break the glass, pull the knob and I'll cum as fast as I can.